we got engaged and are going to get married by the end of this year.
my husband-to-be says he doesn't want me to work but be a housewife. (well actually i enjoy cooking and doing housework quite a lot)
he is earning more than enough to support his parents and probably mine as well. but the fact that i'm only 21 leaves my parents, esp. my dad, really disappointed as he thinks women who have their own career can better protect themselves and perhaps hv a prominent position in the relation.
is it true? i think every woman is destinated to hv 'family' as her goal for life. any ft housewife can share your experience? how old were u when u became a ft housewife?
The ability to be self sufficient and independent is added insurance for you and your children.
Of course whether you choose to do so after you have the qualification and work experience is up to you.
You are very young now.
What about in 10 / 20 / 30 years time.
What common topics will you have with your husband?
What common interest will you two share?
Things change during a life time.
There maybe a time when you need to be strong for the family.
You need to prepare yourself just in case.
maybe becox i am way too young to see it through.....but here on BK i've bumped into plenty of stories like a husband having affaires, couples ending up in divorce.....maybe it's true that everyone would change someday and we should prepare for our own 'insurance' then? omg!
I think the problem is that you haven\'t worked full time before, you don\'t even know if you enjoy having your career or not. Other than affairs and such, in a relationship communication and respect are the keys. If your husband told you not to work then you don\'t work, it\'s like placing an order rather than communicating each needs... After you have got a full time job, then you may have other plans in life, maybe having a baby and such, then you could decide whether to be a full time mum or housewife at that time...
I also agree with your father. You are too young and should explore your life a bit more. Social life and work life can be marvellous and modern women should at least have a taste of it. Broaden your horizon and experience life and freedom when you're still young and have the chance. After having kids, you can't do it anymore.
Moreover, wouldn't it be too colourless to have a world with your husband only and staying at home all the time? Without any work experience, how can you secure your own life? Sometimes, accidents and anything unexpected could happen. Equipping yourself with work and income, you're having more bargaining power. Relationships between husband and wife change from time to time. I won't support you to become a property of your husband and totally dependent on him. If you have a higher social status and more self-confidence, he will respect you more and have a lesser chance of affairs.
Why get marry so early?? You are so young and deserve to see the real world before making such a lifetime decision.
Agree with your dad 100%. Don't waste your education. A career makes a woman more confident and attractive! It also helps you make more friends too!!
I'm 23 year old this year and had a baby girl.I'm not enjoying to be a ftm as i'm really agreed with some jm said having your own career path would make a woman more self confident and secure.
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GTFH
oh, so are u planning to work again?
發表於 14-4-7 21:11
mc <()>
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