thanks for your response
i know my son 想引你們注意
I"ve tried many many times "樽"下身高度跟他一樣, 耐心問他想要什麼. he refuse to listen to us when he was losing his temper
i don't want to 大聲對罵 at him and i'm not always doing that to him, but i want to stop him from shouting and throwing things and hitting me, but i really can't stand his repeated act (every day)
why? why? why my son has such behaviour?!
both me and my husband are getting tired and we're frustrated about his behaviour
点處理?
我立即收線,問佢咩事掉嘢,佢無理我,仲想掉佢手上的玩具車,but 被我 stop 佢,我同佢講,你掉table & chair,媽媽而家要收起,then i took the table & chair into my room, he cried & shout & hit me & jump & ask me to hug him.
i told him that he's wrong to throw things and hit somebody when he was unhappy. but it seems that he did not listen. he continue to cry and i asked him to stand on a floor tile for 2 mins as punishment.
of course he continue to jump and run to me during that period, then after 2 mins, I carried him to the toilet and I said to him he need to be isolated becoz he failed to stand properly. he still struggle, but at last, he stood better in the toilet for some time (less than 2 mins)
最後点收科?
after that , I gave him a hug and explained why I punished him (1. throw things away;2. hit mami), and I asked him why he throw things away suddenly (he told me the table and chair are naughty) and I taught him next time he should tell me if they are naughty or he could punish them by asking them to stand aside.--->everytime when he calm down from anger, he will tell me this things (excuse/ reason?)
then he nod his head and usually I'll release him
thanks for handling my problem and I will try your method
but the difficulty is he will chase me and seek my hug
every time when I carry him to the naughty corner (to sit/ to stand), he will try his best to stick to me everywhere I go and continue to cry and hit me
how could I control this behaviour?
and the big burden is my 6299, they won't buy my method of teaching when my son lost his temper
so everytime I try, I failed to control my son
actually my son nearly 3yr is acting the same as yours
He always cannot stay on the chair and just walk around when we have to eat outside, also he would like to find someone to go out with him, eg daddy, grandparents, if not, he will lose temper and struggle
he seldom ask me to go out with him becoz he knows I won't do that for him easily
I don't know how to improve such kind of behaviour
sa2501
we've tried your method many times, every time after he returned to his seat, he will not play with what the toys we've brought for him, he will struggle again to go out
Hi SandraLo
I've tried your method, seems that he's better these days
he's really attention seeking becoz I found that in these days, he's having his christmas holiday and so I took my annual leave to look after him, he seldom lost temper and every time when he wants to, he would told me and I give him a hug first, then he would be better and no chance to lost temper
thanks for your advice
I'll try my best to help him to control his temper
although he will still lost temper, but I realize that he is improving
hi sa2501
I've tried using books/ maagazine --> just for a short time, sometimes it's no use
games u've suggested --> only a short time also, he loves to touch/ have interaction with others
he loves to explore more than stay in his seat
[我覺得呢個方法好似唔work:
一/seems that 佢唔怕hungry, 只要有得玩就ok;
二/要自己zzz ==>變成罰佢自己zzz(理應encourage自己zzz, not a punishment, right?)
三/如果無得同我zzz, 我地要攪好耐至令佢zzz – after 12.00 am (佢會喺房出出入入 request many many times for my companion, of course會 :-( :-( :-( :-( :-( :-( but 我唔理佢, then dad will explain to him & sleep with him, ===> 結果佢果晚會zzz得唔好, 影響next morning唔肯起身返學, 訓得少, 個人累, 放學回家又容易發脾氣, 食飯又無心機啦, 咪好似一個惡性循環?!)
btw, 我都好想佢早d zzz, 佢返全日, 喺學校 zzz 咗 afternoon sleep (if don't let him sleep, he will lose temper easily), 晚晚早極都要stay on bed until 11.30pm 至zzz (10.30pm go to bed already), 第二朝又唔願起身…唉!
I'll try to improve myself and work hard for my kid
about eating:
I'll try your method tonite:
1> no tea time after 6 pm
2> 8 pm dinner
3> less rice
4> no tv
5> 不要不停的提他或哦他
thanks for your response
hope to reading your further advise
btw, I have been praising him many many times when he was not doing bad things but he will quicly forget what I've praised him and do the bad thing again afterwards, eg he loves to watch different types of vehicles at the road kerb of the street, it's very dangerous and he will struggle with me every time when I pick him from school. and I have told him not to touch the wheel of bus and I have praised him in the street when we saw bus stopping at the bus stop, but seems that he always forget what I've praised him before and he's repeating the same malpractice. He knows he should not do that but he can't control. how should I do?
每次揍放學我都好提心吊膽, 唔敢同佢去唔同的地方, 佢心情好都拿拿聲&一路提住/讚住返屋企, 相反就罵住返屋企, 或者抱返去算數
6299 & 婆婆都怕咗揍佢放學/ 去玩(因為佢好容易'fing'開佢地隻手走咗去馬路睇車,又捉佢唔到) 個個都話揍佢放學/ 去街好似開大細咁, 好有壓力, 又抱唔得幾多, 又追唔到嘞, 真係驚有意外!
I know praising is workable, but is it necessary for me to praise him minute by minute to remind him he is good? pls advise, many thanks
u mentioned: Ignore 係唔俾反應
我罰我仔時我都試過在安全的情況下(在家)由他自己吵鬧, 但佢會追住我&攬實我對腳唔放, 同我講話佢冷靜咗啦, but actually he's not really calm down, he only wants me to hug him becoz once when I hug him, he lose temper again, so I will 放低佢 and repeat what I've told him <I will hug u when u calm down>, he will repeat & repeat the same act until several times and chase me around the house (usually last for more than an hour) until he could really calm down, 咁我就同佢講道理
==> do u mean that under what situation/ location (even in the street) he lose temper and hit ppl, we just STOP him and say NO to him? but he's too quick to hit ppl and we'r too slow to stop him....so he had been scolded by ppl in the street previously, and as him mum, I also suffered :-( :-(
for this, I'm just feeling frustrated about such act (esp affecting others), I'll get for his act, but feeling :-( :-( at the same time
I know he's not the one who will hit ppl and he's not the worst, he will be good after some time and my LORD is always with me, HE will carry me thru, but u know, human is human! limited ability! I need
I just want to help him to be good and could set a good example / guidance to his little brother, I know I have to improve him and teach him well to benefit his little brother, if not, I'll have 2 little monsters!! then the situation would be much worser then today
==> I have used to sleep with him, I'll close the bedroom door and switch off the light and stay aside with him until he sleep. but he will run away from the bed and open the door to run in & out from the bedroom, sometimes switching on & off the lamp, sometimes he will request to go to the toilet and he will play the watertap & pour water over the toilet, once he could escape from the bedroom, he would do everything he could to escape from sleeping, eg he used to use a touch to hit door/ window/ TV/ floor (I received complaints from the ppl downstairs) if the day he was tired enough to stay on bed, he would 'meet' u/ crawl on your body/ jump on the bed/ use blankets to cover his face (he said he acts like a monster wor) --- everything he could do to wake u up , then how could I ignore him le?
I've tried to praise him when he stay on bed but he would acting bad very quick and forget my praising
how could I do?
thank you thank you for your patience and handling techniques, I know I'm not very familiar to use it and I'll try my best to remember all of them and use them!
唔好意思, 好多問題, Hoping that I'm not troubling u la, anyway, sincere thanks
here's his weekday schedule:
wake up time: 7:30 am
usually he will finish 6 oz milk before go to school
breakfast at school: 9:00 am
snack at school: 10:30 am
lunch at school: 12:00 nn
afternoon sleep in school: 1.00 pm - 3:00 pm
tea at school: 4:00 pm
pick up from school: 6:00 pm
dinner: around 8:00 pm, sometimes 9:00 pm
<remarks: I & my 6299 lives in the same estate, after I gave birth to my son, I started to dine with them every nite (becoz they look after my son from 0 yr to 2 yr) so I could not control the dinner time. Recently, my son was accepted by a famous kindergarten and my husband wants me to train him well (eg learn to read, learn to eat, learn to control his temper, etc...etc...) so he separate my son & me to dine at home rather than dine with my 6299 ---> so I can't control/ change our dinner time>
you mean you have to dine with your son (two of you) at home ?
==>YES
平日 diet 會不會有很多零食及甜食". (糖、薯片蝦條之類)
==> I usually give him 1 marshmellow when I pick him up from school (to encourage him to wear shoes himself and behave well on the way to home) a small bread + 6-8 oz milk at home after I pick him up from school (I already cut it starting from yesterday)
u r right! 我罰到佢而家都唔怕坐naughty chair/ 罰企(除非入房熄燈閂門), 所以我真係好擔心!!點算?
ignore:
唔通我 ignore 佢到一個地步佢 throw things to the window/ tv, or climb up the window frame 我都 ignore? u r right! I can't totally ignore him for these acts!
in fact I am just doing that for the last 2 nights, I did not response to his behaviour, including 'meet' my eyes & lips (I pretend to have slept), no toys in bedroom already (all are in dinning room), he just played with his fingers!! he even did not zzz after I have really zzz until my husband noticed that he was still awake! I heard my husband scolded him then he quickly closed his eyes and zzz.
is there still anything wrong? pls advise!! thousand thanks
7:30pm-8:15 dinner
==> 佢食咗2啖就離開位, 我同佢講 gave him one chance and then he sat down and ate 2 more spoons, then left his chair again, this time 我收碗之後就無再比番, he & 我無比 any response and ate my own dish, after 15 mins, he calm down and play his other toys, then 我叫佢執返d玩具比我沒收, then 罰企, 又隔籬, 但佢不斷係度玩, 企得唔好, 結果拉据左成個鐘至被我罰完
so we could not have play time at 8:30 - 9:30
企完我同佢傾咗一陣(mainly 解釋點解要罰佢)
(佢由我收碗後我每叫佢做嘢佢就不斷問我會唔會同佢zzz--of coz including 罰企, 我無答佢, 我呢段時間當咗自己啞咗)
9:30 ==> read one book with him
10:00 ==> ask him to brush teeth
10:15 ==> ask him to zzz 佢帶住MICKEY(伴ZZ毛公仔)上床著片, 佢問我: [媽媽你可唔可以坐係度(床邊)陪我ZZZ呀?]我放返佢係MICKEY隔離, 我坐床邊, 之後我又啞咗, 佢離開zzz的位置, 我抱返佢去zzz的位置, 如是者幾次, 佢驚我走開, 不停開眼望我, 我只望住佢, 後來佢開眼望我的次數相隔長咗, 約10:40, C6返來, 佢聽到即彈起, 想走, 又被我抱返佢去zzz的位置, 佢 :-( :-( :-( , c6入黎同佢傾咗一陣約3分鐘, 表示知佢唔開心, then goodnite, c6出去, 我continue坐返床邊, 佢只望咗一至二次, 11:05, zzzz