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別墅

積分: 685


1#
發表於 06-12-12 11:51 |顯示全部帖子

小朋友大脾氣,可以點教

小兒3歲未夠,好臭脾氣,且經常性發作(可以無故發脾氣,每日都會有兩三次),發脾氣時必定打人,大叫,掉嘢
請問可以點教


別墅

積分: 685


2#
發表於 06-12-12 12:57 |顯示全部帖子

Re: 小朋友大脾氣,可以點教

could you pleaes give me some idea about 遊戲冶療
other than 遊戲冶療, what should/ could we do?
many thanks


別墅

積分: 685


3#
發表於 06-12-12 16:16 |顯示全部帖子

Re: 小朋友大脾氣,可以點教

hi snwm

thanks for your response
i know my son 想引你們注意
I"ve tried many many times "樽"下身高度跟他一樣, 耐心問他想要什麼. he refuse to listen to us when he was losing his temper
i don't want to 大聲對罵 at him and i'm not always doing that to him, but i want to stop him from shouting and throwing things and hitting me, but i really can't stand his repeated act (every day)
why? why? why my son has such behaviour?!
both me and my husband are getting tired and we're frustrated about his behaviour


別墅

積分: 685


4#
發表於 06-12-14 17:08 |顯示全部帖子

Re: 小朋友大脾氣,可以點教

通常因セ事發脾氣?
以昨日為例:
放學回家食飯,一邊食一邊睇vcd,食完飯睇睇下vcd,我接電話,當我正傾電話時,他突然推倒自己的枱及掉自己正坐著的chair 及大叫

点處理?
我立即收線,問佢咩事掉嘢,佢無理我,仲想掉佢手上的玩具車,but 被我 stop 佢,我同佢講,你掉table & chair,媽媽而家要收起,then i took the table & chair into my room, he cried & shout & hit me & jump & ask me to hug him.

i told him that he's wrong to throw things and hit somebody when he was unhappy. but it seems that he did not listen. he continue to cry and i asked him to stand on a floor tile for 2 mins as punishment.

of course he continue to jump and run to me during that period, then after 2 mins, I carried him to the toilet and I said to him he need to be isolated becoz he failed to stand properly. he still struggle, but at last, he stood better in the toilet for some time (less than 2 mins)

最後点收科?
after that , I gave him a hug and explained why I punished him (1. throw things away;2. hit mami), and I asked him why he throw things away suddenly (he told me the table and chair are naughty) and I taught him next time he should tell me if they are naughty or he could punish them by asking them to stand aside.--->everytime when he calm down from anger, he will tell me this things (excuse/ reason?)
then he nod his head and usually I'll release him

any comment/ advise?



別墅

積分: 685


5#
發表於 06-12-19 20:26 |顯示全部帖子

Re: 小朋友大脾氣,可以點教

hi SandraLo

thanks for handling my problem and I will try your method
but the difficulty is he will chase me and seek my hug
every time when I carry him to the naughty corner (to sit/ to stand), he will try his best to stick to me everywhere I go and continue to cry and hit me
how could I control this behaviour?
and the big burden is my 6299, they won't buy my method of teaching when my son lost his temper
so everytime I try, I failed to control my son


別墅

積分: 685


6#
發表於 06-12-21 12:21 |顯示全部帖子

Re: 小朋友大脾氣,可以點教

SoBBMaMi

actually my son nearly 3yr is acting the same as yours

He always cannot stay on the chair and just walk around when we have to eat outside, also he would like to find someone to go out with him, eg daddy, grandparents, if not, he will lose temper and struggle

he seldom ask me to go out with him becoz he knows I won't do that for him easily

I don't know how to improve such kind of behaviour


別墅

積分: 685


7#
發表於 06-12-21 12:36 |顯示全部帖子

Re: 小朋友大脾氣,可以點教

thanks for all your sharing


別墅

積分: 685


8#
發表於 06-12-21 16:45 |顯示全部帖子

Re: 小朋友大脾氣,可以點教

sa2501
we've tried your method many times, every time after he returned to his seat, he will not play with what the toys we've brought for him, he will struggle again to go out


別墅

積分: 685


9#
發表於 06-12-29 19:41 |顯示全部帖子

Re: 小朋友大脾氣,可以點教

Hi SandraLo
I've tried your method, seems that he's better these days
he's really attention seeking becoz I found that in these days, he's having his christmas holiday and so I took my annual leave to look after him, he seldom lost temper and every time when he wants to, he would told me and I give him a hug first, then he would be better and no chance to lost temper
thanks for your advice
I'll try my best to help him to control his temper
although he will still lost temper, but I realize that he is improving


別墅

積分: 685


10#
發表於 06-12-29 20:02 |顯示全部帖子

Re: 小朋友大脾氣,可以點教

hi sa2501
I've tried using books/ maagazine --> just for a short time, sometimes it's no use
games u've suggested --> only a short time also, he loves to touch/ have interaction with others
he loves to explore more than stay in his seat


別墅

積分: 685


11#
發表於 07-3-29 16:09 |顯示全部帖子

Re: 小朋友大脾氣,可以點教

Hi SandraLo

我每晚同我仔食飯都好勞氣 -- 因為佢坐唔定, 一開飯就話唔食, 好辛苦(又氹又罵都要食一個鐘)至食完半碗飯(兒童闊碗), 佢知我會收碗, 所以叫我比機會佢, 又會攬住隻碗唔放
出街食又係唔坐定定, 又企上chair又玩fork/ spoon/ plate/ bowl, 試過比佢帶玩具/ 畫畫, 都只可令佢坐一陣(當然亦都有大力讚賞, 但都只係坐定一陣), 但佢好快又要落地四圍走, 或搞搞陣

我而家令佢食飯的「利誘」係可以同我zzz(佢最鐘意), 食飯限時一個鐘, 食唔晒d飯我就收碗(又要我全程睇住&勞氣一輪), 收碗佢就無得同我zzz(佢的死穴), 要自己zzz

[我覺得呢個方法好似唔work:
一/seems that 佢唔怕hungry, 只要有得玩就ok;
二/要自己zzz ==>變成罰佢自己zzz(理應encourage自己zzz, not a punishment, right?)
三/如果無得同我zzz, 我地要攪好耐至令佢zzz – after 12.00 am (佢會喺房出出入入 request many many times for my companion, of course會 :-( :-( :-( :-( :-( :-( but 我唔理佢, then dad will explain to him & sleep with him, ===> 結果佢果晚會zzz得唔好, 影響next morning唔肯起身返學, 訓得少, 個人累, 放學回家又容易發脾氣, 食飯又無心機啦, 咪好似一個惡性循環?!)

===> 專家你點睇呀?

我地平時食飯唔睇tv, 不過有一次我處理完佢d脾氣(成個鐘呀), 我去沖涼, 開隻vcd叫佢食住先, 點知佢自己一個又坐得定又食得好快喎 , 到我坐埋一齊食呢佢又故態復萌, 咁我可以點做呢?

唔知係咪我份人比較燥, 好容易罵佢,唔知係咪罵得多, 我覺得佢有點「軑皮蛇」, 我罵佢佢好似聽唔到, 仲嘻皮笑臉,被佢激c

佢仲有發脾氣(可能我唔夠堅持la)<如喺街上發脾氣, 佢仲會打人tim>,例如放學回家我快過佢除鞋洗手呢, 佢就會發脾氣打我 (佢知唔啱, 會呵返我, 但佢次次都會忍唔到手打人--打咗再呵返&道歉), c 都要我著返對鞋等佢怏過我, 我試過 ignore 佢呢d行為, 教佢, 佢對我死纏難打(攬實我對腳唔放)唔肯受罰eg naughty chair, 可以點改佢呢?

btw, 我都好想佢早d zzz, 佢返全日, 喺學校 zzz 咗 afternoon sleep (if don't let him sleep, he will lose temper easily), 晚晚早極都要stay on bed until 11.30pm 至zzz (10.30pm go to bed already), 第二朝又唔願起身…唉!

請賜教賜教!!謝謝!!


別墅

積分: 685


12#
發表於 07-3-30 09:32 |顯示全部帖子

Re: 小朋友大脾氣,可以點教

okok SandraLo

I'll try to improve myself and work hard for my kid

about eating:
I'll try your method tonite:
1> no tea time after 6 pm
2> 8 pm dinner
3> less rice
4> no tv
5> 不要不停的提他或哦他

thanks for your response

hope to reading your further advise

btw, I have been praising him many many times when he was not doing bad things but he will quicly forget what I've praised him and do the bad thing again afterwards, eg he loves to watch different types of vehicles at the road kerb of the street, it's very dangerous and he will struggle with me every time when I pick him from school. and I have told him not to touch the wheel of bus and I have praised him in the street when we saw bus stopping at the bus stop, but seems that he always forget what I've praised him before and he's repeating the same malpractice. He knows he should not do that but he can't control. how should I do?
每次揍放學我都好提心吊膽, 唔敢同佢去唔同的地方, 佢心情好都拿拿聲&一路提住/讚住返屋企, 相反就罵住返屋企, 或者抱返去算數
6299 & 婆婆都怕咗揍佢放學/ 去玩(因為佢好容易'fing'開佢地隻手走咗去馬路睇車,又捉佢唔到) 個個都話揍佢放學/ 去街好似開大細咁, 好有壓力, 又抱唔得幾多, 又追唔到嘞, 真係驚有意外!

I know praising is workable, but is it necessary for me to praise him minute by minute to remind him he is good? pls advise, many thanks

u mentioned: Ignore 係唔俾反應
我罰我仔時我都試過在安全的情況下(在家)由他自己吵鬧, 但佢會追住我&攬實我對腳唔放, 同我講話佢冷靜咗啦, but actually he's not really calm down, he only wants me to hug him becoz once when I hug him, he lose temper again, so I will 放低佢 and repeat what I've told him <I will hug u when u calm down>, he will repeat & repeat the same act until several times and chase me around the house (usually last for more than an hour) until he could really calm down, 咁我就同佢講道理

==> do u mean that under what situation/ location (even in the street) he lose temper and hit ppl, we just STOP him and say NO to him? but he's too quick to hit ppl and we'r too slow to stop him....so he had been scolded by ppl in the street previously, and as him mum, I also suffered :-( :-(

for this, I'm just feeling frustrated about such act (esp affecting others), I'll get for his act, but feeling :-( :-( at the same time

I know he's not the one who will hit ppl and he's not the worst, he will be good after some time and my LORD is always with me, HE will carry me thru, but u know, human is human! limited ability! I need
I just want to help him to be good and could set a good example / guidance to his little brother, I know I have to improve him and teach him well to benefit his little brother, if not, I'll have 2 little monsters!! then the situation would be much worser then today

about sleeeping:
問題係:佢搞嘢你又去話佢,咁佢就已經得逞啦!如果佢搞嘢你唔理佢,我就打死都唔信佢可以自己一個玩兩個鐘!

==> I have used to sleep with him, I'll close the bedroom door and switch off the light and stay aside with him until he sleep. but he will run away from the bed and open the door to run in & out from the bedroom, sometimes switching on & off the lamp, sometimes he will request to go to the toilet and he will play the watertap & pour water over the toilet, once he could escape from the bedroom, he would do everything he could to escape from sleeping, eg he used to use a touch to hit door/ window/ TV/ floor (I received complaints from the ppl downstairs) if the day he was tired enough to stay on bed, he would 'meet' u/ crawl on your body/ jump on the bed/ use blankets to cover his face (he said he acts like a monster wor) --- everything he could do to wake u up , then how could I ignore him le?
I've tried to praise him when he stay on bed but he would acting bad very quick and forget my praising
how could I do?

thank you thank you for your patience and handling techniques, I know I'm not very familiar to use it and I'll try my best to remember all of them and use them!

唔好意思, 好多問題, Hoping that I'm not troubling u la, anyway, sincere thanks


別墅

積分: 685


13#
發表於 07-3-31 16:06 |顯示全部帖子

Re: 小朋友大脾氣,可以點教

Hi Sandra

thank you for your encouragement & response!

here's his weekday schedule:
wake up time: 7:30 am
usually he will finish 6 oz milk before go to school
breakfast at school: 9:00 am
snack at school: 10:30 am
lunch at school: 12:00 nn
afternoon sleep in school: 1.00 pm - 3:00 pm
tea at school: 4:00 pm
pick up from school: 6:00 pm
dinner: around 8:00 pm, sometimes 9:00 pm
<remarks: I & my 6299 lives in the same estate, after I gave birth to my son, I started to dine with them every nite (becoz they look after my son from 0 yr to 2 yr) so I could not control the dinner time. Recently, my son was accepted by a famous kindergarten and my husband wants me to train him well (eg learn to read, learn to eat, learn to control his temper, etc...etc...) so he separate my son & me to dine at home rather than dine with my 6299 ---> so I can't control/ change our dinner time>


別墅

積分: 685


14#
發表於 07-4-1 01:33 |顯示全部帖子

Re: 小朋友大脾氣,可以點教

you mean you have to dine with your son (two of you) at home ?
==>YES

平日 diet 會不會有很多零食及甜食". (糖、薯片蝦條之類)
==> I usually give him 1 marshmellow when I pick him up from school (to encourage him to wear shoes himself and behave well on the way to home) a small bread + 6-8 oz milk at home after I pick him up from school (I already cut it starting from yesterday)


別墅

積分: 685


15#
發表於 07-4-2 11:35 |顯示全部帖子

Re: 小朋友大脾氣,可以點教

一下子乜都冇得食好似罸咁!

u r right! 昨晚我同佢講因為大個仔唔要著片zzz, 飲完奶奶zzz會濕片, 所以無咗睡前奶奶, 佢好唔開心, 話我罵佢!

講開昨晚zzz, 我照你方法:
由 10:30 pm 開始,叫佢去刷牙, 跟住熜晒全屋d燈(仲係佢自己熄ge) <其實佢已經好zzz, 因為食完飯我老公帶佢去跑步>我陪佢上床(11:00pm), 就算佢搞我都唔比反應, 點知到我zzz, 我老公發現佢仲係度玩手指!(已過12:00am)
我老公即罵佢, 佢至肯zzz

佢嗰"6-8 oz milk"如果係bb飲嗰 d 就太 heavy 啦,可改為豆槳

ok, 今晚試改為豆槳, 維他奶 ok 嗎?

你屋企是否就係三個人?
==> 老公, 我, 大仔 (3 歲), 細仔 (7 個幾月)
細仔早上由工人接去6299度, 等我老公放工揍返家(每晚我地都自己揍返), 工人煮好飯就會攞過我家(而家我同我仔同6299分開食, 因為99會忍唔住餵仔, 同埋佢係6299度好無規舉)

有冇人幫手?
==> 工人 + 6299 (佢地住 next block to us)

佢扭唔扭你老公?
==> 我老公話我唔係度佢唔會扭佢, 但佢聽我話多過聽我老公話
不過我老公同我做法有d唔同:
1.老公會主動抱佢返學(因為要趕時間返工), 我唔會抱佢放學, 我地拖住行返屋企 -- 我老公叫我試下抱返佢, 好唔好呢?
2.我老公放工返家都成10:00pm, 有時揍埋個細的都要成10:30pm (對亞仔的時間 about 30 mins - 1 hour before zzz), 所以佢見到我老公會好開心, 我老公又會就住就住
3.我老公放假時多數會帶佢去街eg去公園, 行山, swim,我係屋企揍細佬
---> 呀!係咪我管得佢太多呢?

老公多數盡量同佢講理(睇心情啦, 有時個人累都會忍唔住罵架!), 佢打細佬(而家多咗打細佬)或唔zzz至會比老公罵 (而家我罵得多! 因而家只有我同佢食飯, 又要改佢一d惡習, 幫佢建立一d常規 -- 因佢以前係6299度唔駛講規舉)


別墅

積分: 685


16#
發表於 07-4-3 11:07 |顯示全部帖子

Re: 小朋友大脾氣,可以點教

hi Sandra

u'r so good to response to me

1. 鮮豆槳好啲
---> why?
2.工人响99度瞓?
---> YES
3.如果你放學抱返佢,以後都要抱,即多一樣嘢扭,制唔過!?
--->我都係咁諗, 今朝我同佢返學, 由出門口等 lift 時佢要抱, 我見佢好攰就抱咗一陣, 跟住我地出到街我就氹佢自己行, 其實佢都知唔應該抱, 因為佢落地時同我講如果比小朋友睇到呢就醜怪嘞
4.我估佢扭嘅對象係你,所以你唔係度佢唔會扭,「佢聽你話多過聽你老公話」亦係同一個原因,因你先係佢嘅 priority
-->我知道佢係人地度--包括學校(無我&老公/ 6299/ 公公婆婆在場的地方)或佢唔識的人到訪會表現得好好!eg 好定, 聽話,合作, sharing, 有禮.....(我知道都開心ge, 因為我教佢d嘢佢原來可以做得到)所以我d朋友都唔信佢可以咁naughty; 但只有我同佢一齊時, 佢就...... so, d人就會以為我好就佢, 唔識教 esp 6299 :-( :-( :-( -- 真係有苦自己知
5.再搞唔倒佢瞓,我可以教你一招「殺手鐧」…….不過担心你唔夠決絕!
-->要啦要啦, 佢擒晚又搞到成12點先zzz, 又要比我地閙啦
6.「所以佢見到我老公會好開心, 我老公又會就住就住」- 就住乜嘢?
-->老公覺得佢想親我地多d至會有咁ge行為, so 佢會同佢玩多d eg 同佢講話似玩下玩下, 會氹下佢開心
7..「的」番佢去99度,可能好啲,因為老人家對食同ZZZ係踩得硬啲,唔會同佢玩!
-->就係6299都怕咗佢, 我試過係佢放假時比佢去99度, 結果連 pm ZZZ 都無, 脾氣仲臭, 一唔 like 就黎! 後來6299用滕條
食飯一樣 -- 老人家唔捨得佢餓,想佢食多d, 但佢又坐唔定, 唯有一邊 一邊追住餵

8.「而家多咗打細佬」- 盡量响佢唔打嗰陣讚佢啦,鬧得多冇效兼麻木!
-->佢可能都想同細佬玩, 但唔知自己咁肉緊, 會整親細佬, 鬧佢又覺得我地偏心, 所以多咗打細佬, 而家教佢點同細佬玩, 點親細佬

hi sa2501
多謝你提點, 但我地無可能9.00pm就zzz(我地分分鐘9.00pm至dinner!我唔理嘞, 9.30pm就收碗) 細佬多數10.00pm同daddy返黎, 我而家10.00pm就叫佢去zzz, 10.30pm熄燈, 佢呢兩晚玩手指都可以玩成個鐘至去zzz!


別墅

積分: 685


17#
發表於 07-4-3 23:12 |顯示全部帖子

Re: 小朋友大脾氣,可以點教

SandraLo

u r right! 我罰到佢而家都唔怕坐naughty chair/ 罰企(除非入房熄燈閂門), 所以我真係好擔心!!點算?

ignore:
唔通我 ignore 佢到一個地步佢 throw things to the window/ tv, or climb up the window frame 我都 ignore? u r right! I can't totally ignore him for these acts!

佢真係不惜任何代價,做好多嘢,要我的反應!
:-( :-( :-( :-( :-( :-( :-( :-(

其實我知我個仔可以好乖,因為佢以前(6299揍時)見人就打,又多手, 乜都搞, 搗蛋, 破壞王, 連管理員都知, 後來我地教返佢,日曰講/教, 做到即讚, 讚好咗(咁啱同你教ge差唔多--我個陣都未上BK請教)

到我初初自己揍返佢時佢都好乖, 無打人,無咁手多乜都搞, 搗蛋&破壞都少咗, 連管理員都讚佢乖咗好多
唔知點解佢呢排曳返(可能我 得佢多)

佢而家最怕無得同我ZZZ/ 無咗我, so 我唯有用呢招去 control 佢(我都唔想!)


別墅

積分: 685


18#
發表於 07-4-4 00:26 |顯示全部帖子

Re: 小朋友大脾氣,可以點教

hi Sandra

in fact I am just doing that for the last 2 nights, I did not response to his behaviour, including 'meet' my eyes & lips (I pretend to have slept), no toys in bedroom already (all are in dinning room), he just played with his fingers!! he even did not zzz after I have really zzz until my husband noticed that he was still awake! I heard my husband scolded him then he quickly closed his eyes and zzz.

is there still anything wrong? pls advise!! thousand thanks


別墅

積分: 685


19#
發表於 07-4-5 15:31 |顯示全部帖子

Re: 小朋友大脾氣,可以點教

Hi Sandra

我地尋晚係咁:

7:30pm-8:15 dinner
==> 佢食咗2啖就離開位, 我同佢講 gave him one chance and then he sat down and ate 2 more spoons, then left his chair again, this time 我收碗之後就無再比番, he & 我無比 any response and ate my own dish, after 15 mins, he calm down and play his other toys, then 我叫佢執返d玩具比我沒收, then 罰企, 又隔籬, 但佢不斷係度玩, 企得唔好, 結果拉据左成個鐘至被我罰完
so we could not have play time at 8:30 - 9:30
企完我同佢傾咗一陣(mainly 解釋點解要罰佢)
(佢由我收碗後我每叫佢做嘢佢就不斷問我會唔會同佢zzz--of coz including 罰企, 我無答佢, 我呢段時間當咗自己啞咗)
9:30 ==> read one book with him
10:00 ==> ask him to brush teeth
10:15 ==> ask him to zzz 佢帶住MICKEY(伴ZZ毛公仔)上床著片, 佢問我: [媽媽你可唔可以坐係度(床邊)陪我ZZZ呀?]我放返佢係MICKEY隔離, 我坐床邊, 之後我又啞咗, 佢離開zzz的位置, 我抱返佢去zzz的位置, 如是者幾次, 佢驚我走開, 不停開眼望我, 我只望住佢, 後來佢開眼望我的次數相隔長咗, 約10:40, C6返來, 佢聽到即彈起, 想走, 又被我抱返佢去zzz的位置, 佢 :-( :-( :-( , c6入黎同佢傾咗一陣約3分鐘, 表示知佢唔開心, then goodnite, c6出去, 我continue坐返床邊, 佢只望咗一至二次, 11:05, zzzz

不過我今朝唔記得讚佢, 有無問題呢? pls comment!

今晚繼續呢個zzz遊戲! 如何?

thank you very much!!!!


別墅

積分: 685


20#
發表於 07-4-7 00:47 |顯示全部帖子

Re: 小朋友大脾氣,可以點教

又上黎報告下先:

尋晚 dinner 收碗收場, 無zzz奶奶, c6同佢zzz, 佢地傾完偈就好快zzz

haha...今朝佢要求要奶奶, 我堅持一定要佢坐定先至有, 結果佢扭咗成個鐘, 坐定咗, 我至比佢, 佢都知要坐定先至有得飲飲食食, 希望佢印象會深

afternoon我地去街, 回程時佢只係响車度zzz咗約30mins, 返到屋企張床就醒!我無叫佢再zzz, 想佢今晚早d zzz

6:00pm -- 佢食咗幾啖粥, 走開, 收碗, 比機會, 坐返, 再走過, 話唔食, 算數, 我收碗

8:00pm -- 去咗姑奶度開餐, 由於有d表哥係度, 佢幾肚餓都必定會去玩, 所以我只比咗 2 x spoon 飯 & 少少餸佢就算, 一開始就 remind 佢今朝飲奶件事, 佢亦表明知道我會夠鐘/ 出位就收碗, 我坐佢隔離食, 佢只係我行開時離開位, 因為表哥有撩佢玩, 佢都有轉身, 轉黎轉去, 佢見我手一拈住佢隻碗就即坐返, 咁我都有叫過佢, 可能份量少啦, 佢都好快 finish, 我即時讚, 不過唔知佢收唔收到? 因為我一話ok, 佢就飛咗去玩嘞!

10:00 pm -- back home, 飲ZZZ奶奶

10:30 pm -- brush teeth, goodnite to c6

10:42 pm -- ready on bed, 今晚佢一定好攰, 因為佢係我度 hug 咗一陣就zzz落床, 佢都有撩我講嘢 eg goodnite mama, i love u, many many goodnite kisses, 我只回應佢 goodnite & i love u

11:18 pm --- zzzz

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